Let’s talk about that moment. You’re standing in the queue at Sainsbury’s, thinking about dinner, when suddenly it hits. A wall of heat rises like someone’s opened an oven door inside your chest. You check your jumper, your coat, your soul. Is it just warm in here? Is the heating broken? Nope. It’s just you, having a full-blown hot flush, right there in aisle 3, next to the frozen peas.
Welcome to one of menopause’s most iconic (and, frankly, annoying) symptoms.
So, What Are Hot Flushes?
Hot flushes (or flashes, if you’re across the pond) are one of the most common menopause symptoms. Caused by fluctuating estrogen levels messing with your body’s internal thermostat, they feel like sudden surges of intense heat. They can last from 30 seconds to 10 minutes, and they often come with:
- A flushed or red face
- Sweating (sometimes buckets of it)
- A racing heart
- A sudden need to remove all clothing, preferably immediately
They can happen during the day, at night (hello, night sweats), in meetings, at the school gates, on the bus, or mid-chat about the weather. Which is ironic, since your own personal weather system has clearly gone rogue.
Why Do They Happen?
Estrogen plays a role in regulating your body temperature. As levels dip during perimenopause and menopause, your brain gets confused and thinks you’re overheating. Even if you’re sitting still. So it tells your body to cool down immediately. Cue sweat, flushed skin, pounding heart, and the urge to throw open every window in the building, even if it’s snowing.
Basically, your brain’s thermostat has lost the plot.
When Will They Stop?
If only there were a straight answer. For most women, hot flushes start in perimenopause and can continue into postmenopause. Some women wave goodbye to them within a couple of years. Others find they linger for five, ten, even fifteen years. Blame the hormones, not yourself.
How to Handle Them (Without Stripping Off in Public)
Right, let’s talk survival. Because no one wants to be the woman fanning herself with a shoe in a team meeting. Here’s what helps when your inner furnace kicks off:
1. Dress Clever
Layers are life. Choose breathable fabrics like cotton and linen, and avoid anything clingy or synthetic. Cardigans, wraps, and scarves are your new best friends. Think fashion, but make it temperature-adaptable.
2. Build a Cooling Kit
Mini fan? Yes. Cooling mist? Even better. A discreet little pouch in your handbag with a spray, a wipe, and maybe even a cold bottle of water can be a game-changer. Some women swear by cold gel packs hidden in bras. Honestly, we get creative.
3. Spot the Triggers
Spicy food, caffeine, red wine, stress, hot baths, tight clothes… all common culprits. You don’t need to give up everything you love, but noticing patterns helps. If every latte leaves you glistening, maybe it’s time for a cold brew.
4. Breathe Through It
Slow, deep breathing can calm your nervous system. Inhale through your nose for four counts, exhale through your mouth for six. Try it when you feel a flush creeping up. It won’t cancel it, but it can make it less dramatic.
5. Cool Your Sleep
Night sweats are next-level. Try breathable bedding, moisture-wicking pyjamas, and sleep with a (quiet) fan on. Put your pillowcase in the freezer before bed. Sleep with one leg out of the duvet like a menopausal flamingo. Do what works.
6. Talk to Someone
HRT is often a lifesaver when it comes to hot flushes. There are also non-hormonal options that can help. Speak to your doctor. There is no prize for suffering in silence.
Real Talk
Hot flushes are weird. Some start in your chest and roll up like a heat wave. Others creep in behind your ears or take over your whole face. One minute you’re fine. Next, you’re glowing like a tomato in a sauna.
I’ve personally walked into my fridge more times than I’d like to admit. Not opened it. Walked into it. Because it was cold and I was desperate.
It’s not just about heat. It’s about the embarrassment, the unpredictability, and the sheer exhaustion of it all. You feel like your body is staging a protest, and you’re the only one holding the sign.
What Actually Helps Long-Term?
- Eat cooling, hydrating foods like cucumber, watermelon, leafy greens, and avoid overdoing sugar
- Exercise, even lightly, to support hormone balance and help your body regulate itself
- Cut back on stress, because cortisol can worsen symptoms
- Talk to other women and share tips, even the silly ones. Your weird solution might be someone else’s miracle
And if you find yourself sitting in your car with the AC on full blast, eating ice cream with your bra in your handbag? That’s just Tuesday now.
Next Time…
We’re talking sex and intimacy during menopause. How it changes, what can help, and how to navigate it all with honesty, humour, and maybe a bit of lube.
Have a hot flush story? A funny hack? A “please tell me this is normal” question? Pop it in the comments over at Facebook – Mylifeandstyleover40. We are doing this together.
You are strong, sweaty, and utterly glorious.
Take care, stay safe.
Becks xo
My life and style over 40 