Summer in My 40s (Almost 50!): Calmer, Messier, and More Me

Summer in my 40s feels calmer, messier, and more me — and I’m OK with that.

With ‘50’ just around the corner, I’ve been thinking a lot about how summer has changed over the years. The bright, buzzing summers of my 20s and 30s feel like a lifetime ago now. Back then, it was all about keeping up the pace, the parties, the pressure to make every moment unforgettable.

Now? Summer feels different.

It’s slower. It’s less polished. And strangely enough, it suits me far better.

The Pace of Summer, Then vs. Now

In my 20s and 30s, summer was urgent and unrelenting. There was always somewhere to be, someone to meet, something to do. I chased sunsets and social calendars like they were slipping through my fingers. And honestly, it was thrilling… until it wasn’t.

Now? Summer starts with the school term ending, a chaotic kitchen calendar, and a sigh of relief. I still chase the sun, but more to hang the laundry out, or sneak in 20 minutes with a book and a lukewarm iced coffee.

My pace has changed. I no longer feel the need to do it all. And I don’t miss the rush.

The Pleasure Hits Differently

Back then, pleasure meant festivals, rooftop bars, and flights booked in a giddy haze. I dressed for other people’s eyes more than my own. I soaked up the scene as if missing out might cause existential damage.

Now, pleasure is quieter but deeper. It’s an early morning cuppa before the rest of the world stirs. It’s making salad for dinner three nights in a row because no one feels like turning the oven on. It’s watching the garden take shape, or watching the garden become chaos, and not minding too much.

Pleasure has shifted from performance to presence.

The Pressure Isn’t Gone—It’s Just Different

Let’s be honest. Summer still brings pressure. But instead of worrying about bikini bodies or booking “the best” holiday, it’s now about juggling childcare, managing work from a stuffy home office, and trying not to spend £20 every time we leave the house.

There’s a new kind of expectation in your late 40s (and beyond), to balance it all gracefully. But I’m learning to push back on that, too. Grace is overrated. Real life is messy, and sometimes that means letting the house look like a holiday rental after checkout day, or forgetting to pack sunscreen. Again.

And you know what? That’s OK.

Embracing the Messy Middle

So yes, summer in my late 40s (almost 50!) is calmer, messier, and more me. It’s a patchwork of laundry piles, last-minute ice cream runs, and the occasional quiet moment that feels like gold dust.

And the best part? I no longer feel like I need to prove anything to Summer. I just get to live it.

Your turn → How have your summers changed as you’ve moved through the decades? Are you feeling this slower, more grounded rhythm, or still chasing the heat of your 20s?

Let’s chat over at Mylifeandstyleover40

Take care, stay safe.

Becks Xo